Rewriting the Rules: What Therapy Is Really About

alissaevans71
May 21
3 min read

In Part 1, we explored how to recognize the subtle (and not-so-subtle) signs that it might be time to seek support—from emotional exhaustion to persistent stress to that quiet sense that something just isn’t right. Then in Part 2, we talked about that “meh” feeling many of us carry—when life looks fine on the outside, but on the inside, we’re drained, disconnected, or simply not ourselves.

So, what holds us back from reaching out?

That’s where we’re headed in this blog post, Part 3. Because even when we know we’re struggling, many of us hesitate to take the next step. Why? Often, it’s the stigma. The stories we’ve been told (and tell ourselves) about what it means to go to therapy.

Let’s take a moment to unpack those myths—and offer some healthier, more hopeful truths instead.

Let's Address the Stigma

Even though mental health is getting more attention than ever, many of us still carry old, limiting beliefs about therapy. Maybe you’ve thought (or heard):

“Therapy is only for people with serious problems.”
“If I need therapy, it means I’m failing.”
“What if people find out I’m going?”

These thoughts can make reaching out feel intimidating or unnecessary—but they don’t tell the full story. The truth is, therapy isn’t about being broken. It’s about being human. And choosing support is one of the most empowered things you can do.

Let’s take a moment to challenge some of the common myths that might be holding you back.

"I’m Not Struggling Enough for Therapy"

This is one of the biggest misconceptions—and one of the most harmful.

Yes, therapy is a powerful tool for people going through crisis, grief, or trauma. But it’s also helpful for everyday stress, decision-making, personal growth, and simply having a space to sort things out.

You don’t have to wait until things are falling apart to ask for support. Just like we see doctors for checkups or hire coaches for fitness goals, therapy can be proactive. It’s a place to talk things through, feel heard, and get curious about yourself in a safe, supportive space.

Think of therapy as emotional maintenance—not emergency response.

"If I Need Help, I’ve Failed"

Let’s be real: life gets overwhelming. We juggle work, relationships, family, health, and expectations (often all at once). Feeling stuck, anxious, or emotionally exhausted doesn’t mean you’re failing—it means you’re human.

Therapy doesn’t point to weakness. It reflects strength. It means you’re self-aware enough to notice something feels off and courageous enough to explore it.

And let’s flip the script: If a friend came to you for help, would you see them as weak? Probably not. You’d admire their honesty. So why not offer yourself the same kindness?

"What Will People Think?"

Worrying about judgment is understandable, especially in a culture that often praises independence and quiet struggle. But here’s what’s quietly true: so many people around you—friends, coworkers, neighbors—are already going to therapy. They just may not talk about it.

Choosing therapy is a deeply personal decision. It’s not for others to validate. And in reality, prioritizing your mental health often inspires others to do the same.

Also, you don’t have to tell anyone you’re going to therapy if you don’t want to. But if you do choose to share, you might be surprised at how supportive people actually are.

Therapy Is a Tool, Not a Label

If there’s one message to take away, it’s this: therapy isn’t about fixing something “wrong” with you. It’s about giving yourself space to breathe, explore, and grow. Whether you’re navigating burnout, struggling with decisions, healing from the past, or just feeling “off,” you deserve support.

You don’t need a crisis to benefit from counseling. You just need the willingness to show up—and the rest unfolds from there.

Until then, take care of yourself the way you would a loved one—gently, without judgment, and with the understanding that it’s okay to not have it all figured out.

Alissa Evans, MS, Associate Licensed Counselor (ALC) under the supervision of Keith A. Cates, Ph.D., LPC-S